Why hello there stranger

Two words. Blog fail.
It's been over a year since my last post. It's a good thing this isn't my job and I don't get paid for it. I'd be living on the mean streets of NYC if that were the case.  I suppose an abbreviated update is necessary. Finished my last outdoor season with a pretty stellar PR. Became an assistant coach at a local Division 3 college, I headed up the Distance crew. Started a long distance relationship with a pretty incredible guy in Minnesota. Battled through a cross country, indoor and outdoor season with my athletes, watching and helping them break through barriers and have PR after PR. Battled through finding a balance to train myself while coaching and working to make end's meat, complete with total flops and PWs (personal worsts). Made a huge life decision to move at the end of this summer from the beloved coast I was born and raised on and my big city living, to the middle of nowhere country, MN (I might be over exaggerating the middle of nowhere part) to be with that previous mentioned incredible guy.

Now here I am, it's July 4th. After my coaching season ended in May, I decided I was going to buckle down and try to salvage the rest of my outdoor season. It hasn't exactly gone as planned, actually it's been way worse. I knew I was not in tip top shape but I didn't think I was as bad off as I really was. While I tried to maintain throughout coaching, I wasn't consistent. That was one key. I also forgot to maintain my mental game, looking back that was one of my biggest flaws. I took all the bad performances pretty hard and to heart. I had given up any and all hope to go to Club Nationals and running a decent time. While I had the standard, I couldn't afford to trip out West without monetary assistance and with team budget cuts, I was the bottom of the totem pole to receive anything.

This past Wednesday things took a change. Thankfully my range of abilities on the track (while not always top tiered) sometimes helps me in some situations, other times it can be a hindrance. This time I used it to my advantage. The only way I was going out to Seattle for Club Nats with help for funding was if I could do multiple events. Seeing as I only had the standard in 400IH, I was a bit in a bind, until I realized we didn't have someone in the steeplechase. Good thing for me both steeple and hurdles are typically under fielded with athletes so goal isn't for time rather than to finish to grab as many team points as possible (I did this a few years ago in Nebraska). That range also helped with relays. So with that my grim outlook was turned around and next week I'll  be flying out to Washington to compete with my team. I have zero expectations for times in races, the goal is to finish as high in place as I can to score points and to fight through the race pain to give my all. I know no matter what I do my season won't have the outcome I wanted but hopefully these final races will bring a little bit of peace to it.

The Best is yet to come

Stuck in a strong hold again, and trying to problem solve my way out. A piece of my puzzle is missing. While I know that there are a few corner pieces that need to be rounded out and lend their hand to a bit of the problem, I don't believe that they are the main contributing factors. So I sit here trying to figure out exactly what piece is missing. I have my many guesses but nothing concrete.
As I mentioned in my last post I decided to stay in NY to race.  Well that has come and gone and I'm $20 lighter, farther from my goal times than previously and banging my head ever so gently against the wall. As for me worrying about the heat being competitive enough, that ended up not being an issue. Yes I realize I made my decision based on training through the season, but that doesn't mean it doesn't frustrate me to no end, because I know that something key is MIA. 

Could it be that my diet/hydration state is off? Could it be I'm still psyching myself way out before racing? Could it be my head is getting in the way during the race? Could it be my lack of consistency in the weight room? Could it be not having a training partner is holding back extra potential in practice? Could it be just the wrong event? Could it be something I just don't know?
So many could it be's now its time to make a few tweaks and clean up. Maybe I'll find that it has been staring at me, right under my nose, it's just in the wrong place in or burying under as couple layers.
Its a good thing I really like puzzles.

Oh I did forgot to mention that even though my race didn't pan out remotely to be what I'd hoped, and after I stopped deciding to be mopey, I took advantage of being at the track with hurdles and turned it into a hurdle workout. A very solid one at that.

Take Plans, Round 2

After a dismal season opener, I had my next chance to open the way I wanted with an over distance race. Yep 1000 meters and personal best you are mine. Well, the 1000 didn't think so highly of that overly confident statement. I thought that I had a PR in me, I honestly thought I had a sub 3 min in me. The race or maybe it might have been mind had other plans. I started off trying to hold back my usual gun it and lead, Lap 1 I was with the mix but off my goal, no problem. Lap 2 I'm in the middle of the pack then make a move to get out but then fall back, split is off, not sure what's going on. I start thinking about being off and rather than DO something I just kinda held on. By 600 meters I'm well off my goal lap intervals and really just going through the motions of just running, not racing. Finally at about 150m left I decided it was time to maybe do something, of course that was WAY too late. I crossed the line and looked up at the results screen to see the result I really didn't want to see, but I knew was warranted as I didn't get in the game. Seriously *Go* button is broken. Blah! Again like the first race recovered too quickly, meaning I didn't give it my all. I know that the 1000 is an odd race and I haven't raced it in 4 years and really it doesn't matter, I hang on it because I'm simply frustrated. I just want to race well. Silver lining of my gray cloud (because I'm not a pessimistic person and there is always something good to take away from the bad) is again the strength/endurance is there from my recovery turnaround time.
Lesson learned run my own race, race not run, get out of my head and simply just GO!
Round 3, Next...

Gotta start somewhere

After the original race I had planned on racing was nonexistent, I decided to open up my season with a meet that's held the day after Christmas. Little did I know when I came to this decision that this meet was condensed to only sprint events (400, 200, 60, 60H)  from the previous full bill of years earlier. At any other point in my training I probably really wouldn't have cared but I did not want to open with anything short, and honestly it wasn't in my plans. I want indoor to be concentrated mostly on the longer endurance part of training, over distance training.

Needless I had bend my plans because I also did not want to open in January. I opted to do a 400/200 double and told myself to treat it like a really hard workout. Unfortunately in my head I can't detach myself from the word race or meet. As much as I want to treat this like a practice, it still looms in my head and I manage to get myself all worked up. Then you can guess what happens I under preform and get frustrated. My 400 was about 3 seconds slower than I know and my coach knows I'm capable to hit at this part of my training. Grrrr. I finished up with plenty left in my tank to repeat that same interval at that same pace with little differential. Oh and wait that's exactly what I did in the 200, split the exact 1st 200 split of my 400. Seriously not impressed. 

I know that it is the season opener and it is used as a cobweb shaker. I can't really expect to be in peak form since the last time I raced was back in July and I did just come off of a crazy work schedule that kept me up weird hours and on my feet for long hours. BUT I did expect to come off a little bit faster than I ran. 

Ok fine for the positive plus side that I need to find in every race, since I did have extra gas left in my tank after the 400, it means I can absolutely go faster. It also means that I'm strong and my 800 should be looking not too shabby. 

Now I'll carry on to the new year and other races.

What should have been

Though my racing this indoor season has been on par to being the best season I've ever raced, it's been quite dismal as well. I only say dismal because this is the least I've ever raced. Up to date not including the race I'm about to recap has only been 2 and it's the end of January which in turn is closing on the end of the season. Usually by the end of December I've got 2 races under my belt coming into peak for February. Granted December going into the beginning of the New Year was super crazy for me with the whole move and whatnot, so I'm not too surprised.
Race #3 brings me to Boston to the very meet that started this blog BU Terrier Invitational. Though I'm in a very different stage in my running career than then, I still get stuck in those same disappointing reveries sometimes. This race in my mind turned into a bomb (some will disagree with me). I think that the lead up to the race was most likely what the "downfall" was. My day didn't quite start off in the most relaxing way possible and everything I usually do beforehand didn't happen. I didn't make matters any better by getting anxious & not sitting still the hours leading up to my race. My execution definitely was far from how it should have gone and though I ended with a PB, I didn't feel good about how it panned to be (this is where the disagreement is). I'm trying not to be too hard on myself because yes a best is a best, BUT I know that my racing shape should have put me at least 2 seconds faster. I'll leave it at that because I really don't want to hark on what should have been. Lesson learned staying consistent with pre-race rituals and relaxing the mind & body beforehand are key to performance. On to the next...