Why hello there stranger

Two words. Blog fail.
It's been over a year since my last post. It's a good thing this isn't my job and I don't get paid for it. I'd be living on the mean streets of NYC if that were the case.  I suppose an abbreviated update is necessary. Finished my last outdoor season with a pretty stellar PR. Became an assistant coach at a local Division 3 college, I headed up the Distance crew. Started a long distance relationship with a pretty incredible guy in Minnesota. Battled through a cross country, indoor and outdoor season with my athletes, watching and helping them break through barriers and have PR after PR. Battled through finding a balance to train myself while coaching and working to make end's meat, complete with total flops and PWs (personal worsts). Made a huge life decision to move at the end of this summer from the beloved coast I was born and raised on and my big city living, to the middle of nowhere country, MN (I might be over exaggerating the middle of nowhere part) to be with that previous mentioned incredible guy.

Now here I am, it's July 4th. After my coaching season ended in May, I decided I was going to buckle down and try to salvage the rest of my outdoor season. It hasn't exactly gone as planned, actually it's been way worse. I knew I was not in tip top shape but I didn't think I was as bad off as I really was. While I tried to maintain throughout coaching, I wasn't consistent. That was one key. I also forgot to maintain my mental game, looking back that was one of my biggest flaws. I took all the bad performances pretty hard and to heart. I had given up any and all hope to go to Club Nationals and running a decent time. While I had the standard, I couldn't afford to trip out West without monetary assistance and with team budget cuts, I was the bottom of the totem pole to receive anything.

This past Wednesday things took a change. Thankfully my range of abilities on the track (while not always top tiered) sometimes helps me in some situations, other times it can be a hindrance. This time I used it to my advantage. The only way I was going out to Seattle for Club Nats with help for funding was if I could do multiple events. Seeing as I only had the standard in 400IH, I was a bit in a bind, until I realized we didn't have someone in the steeplechase. Good thing for me both steeple and hurdles are typically under fielded with athletes so goal isn't for time rather than to finish to grab as many team points as possible (I did this a few years ago in Nebraska). That range also helped with relays. So with that my grim outlook was turned around and next week I'll  be flying out to Washington to compete with my team. I have zero expectations for times in races, the goal is to finish as high in place as I can to score points and to fight through the race pain to give my all. I know no matter what I do my season won't have the outcome I wanted but hopefully these final races will bring a little bit of peace to it.

What should have been

Though my racing this indoor season has been on par to being the best season I've ever raced, it's been quite dismal as well. I only say dismal because this is the least I've ever raced. Up to date not including the race I'm about to recap has only been 2 and it's the end of January which in turn is closing on the end of the season. Usually by the end of December I've got 2 races under my belt coming into peak for February. Granted December going into the beginning of the New Year was super crazy for me with the whole move and whatnot, so I'm not too surprised.
Race #3 brings me to Boston to the very meet that started this blog BU Terrier Invitational. Though I'm in a very different stage in my running career than then, I still get stuck in those same disappointing reveries sometimes. This race in my mind turned into a bomb (some will disagree with me). I think that the lead up to the race was most likely what the "downfall" was. My day didn't quite start off in the most relaxing way possible and everything I usually do beforehand didn't happen. I didn't make matters any better by getting anxious & not sitting still the hours leading up to my race. My execution definitely was far from how it should have gone and though I ended with a PB, I didn't feel good about how it panned to be (this is where the disagreement is). I'm trying not to be too hard on myself because yes a best is a best, BUT I know that my racing shape should have put me at least 2 seconds faster. I'll leave it at that because I really don't want to hark on what should have been. Lesson learned staying consistent with pre-race rituals and relaxing the mind & body beforehand are key to performance. On to the next...