I hate making decisions. Actually let me rephrase that I hate having to choose between decisions. Even in school I hated multiple choice tests, I preferred short answer questions (essays weren't my cup of tea either). Yes I realize making choices is an integral part of adult life, and really there's no getting around it, but really I'd prefer not to have to. Mostly because I'm ridiculously analytical and break EVERYTHING down to the tiniest molecules. This causes much inner conflict.
The funniest part of it all, is most of the time the most tumultuous conflicted decisions aren't even that serious. I mean give some life and death decisions and bam the verdict is quick, mindless and painless (I say this now). Then ask me to choose between coffee or tea for breakfast and we've got charts as to why each would be worthwhile and detrimental. For the record I usually always go with coffee in the morning and that's not really a true conflict but I figured it was an easy analogy.
Now let me fast forward to my non-threatening life decision I'm faced with now. Where I'm racing my next race.
One of my choices is in NY, the other Boston. Now I know what you're thinking, duh you live in New York race in New York. Now let me break it down to you as to why it's not the simplest answer.
The race in NY while yes it is close by, it's not exactly known to be highly competitive. This meet can be hit or miss with the competition. Since there is a big meet in Boston the next day, it's likely to be on the miss side, especially for the 800, where I need a solid field to run what I'm aiming for. I understand that you run your own race and leading an entire race isn't all that bad. But when you're leading a pack that's on your back it's completely different than leading a pack that's back 6-7 sec (this is what happened when I last raced an 800 at this meet). It's hard to stay in the game at that point, for me this is a breaking point and I REALLY want a solid fast race. The plus side is 0 travel, I actually jog the 1 mile to track as my warmup (yea I'm a little spoiled with that).
Now let's flip to the meet in Boston. This is a HIGHLY competitive meet. No doubt I won't have to worry about the race field. I'll also get to see my Boston peeps. Downside to this meet is travel, and as I've mentioned in previous posts, I do not travel well in wheeled vehicles. Train and air are out of the question because of budget constraints. This leads to the next downside when travel is involved usually the cost for the meet increases tenfold. Factor in transport (even if I hitch a ride with a teammate, I still feel obligated to throw gas & toll money to help & thank them) plus food (athlete's gotta eat a meal) plus the entry fee the total cost is at least doubled if not tripled. And I'm on the super saver plan at the moment (this was coined by an old teammate for tight budget) Gah!
And now I sit here stuck on my fence, weighing out which option is best at this moment. Which chance do I take?? I have until Monday at 11:59p to make my final decision. Oh decisions, decisions.